10:08 - Huangshan, China

Early on yesterday I knew that whatever happened, it would be a nightmarish sort of day. You know, the kind that would help explain why it is that something like 85% of Americans don't even have a passport. So in a moment of morbid curiosity, I decided to time the amount of time spent actually travelling, hence the title. However, truth be told, the actual amount between walking out of one hotel and into another was in the neighborhood of 14 hours and change.

The day started out on a crappy note when we missed the first bus. It was a nine-hour trip, but that was scratched almost immediately. Oh yeahh, time to 'fess up. As I started to blog about the China leg of this trip, I wrote everything in the first person as if I was doing this solo. Actually, my pal Chao from last year's China trip joined me from the get-go and we've been going through all the China-stuff as a team. I guess I had hoped to make it appear as if I could handle China on my own. The fact is, for the overwhelming most part, I can't see how a non-Chinese speaking person (even one with my considerable experience) could possibly get around this country and in particular on a day like yesterday when things didn't exactly go as planned. Without Chao in tow, I'd be in the middle of a rice paddy right now trying to figure out how to contact my embassy. So, yeahh, he's been around. He gets to practice his English and I get a little peace of mind and after four weeks of going solo, it's nice to have a friend around.

So, yes, we missed the bus and ended up having to take another bus to a different city (Jiujiang) where we would then (in theory) catch another bus to here. First off, the 'bus' was a basically a 15-passenger van, but I admit that we were pretty comfortable in there. Of course upon arriving, we were told that there was no bus that day. So we hopped in a taxi and went to the train station to see what our options were there. They basically were non-existent, but we were told that there was a bus that went to (yet) another city (Jing Dezheng) that would allow us to take the train that we wanted. So, back into another taxi to the bus station. This time the bus was an actual bus that happened to be driven by my dad! Well, not really, but he might as well have been. I mean that in the nicest way possible. Honestly, for as slowly as he drove and on a road that was undergoing construction, I could've built a house of cards on my lap and not had it collapse. I guess all my venom about the drivers here must have been read by the censors and forwarded to someone in high places here.

Well, the best part was coming up...I typically prefer trains to bus travel for any number of reasons, but I have to say that after the four hours-plus yesterday on the last big leg of the trip, I can think of a dozen very unpleasant things I'd rather do before I get back on a Chinese train. I'd rather be dodging mopeds in Saigon or sitting in a sadistic dentist's chair, for example. How to describe it? In a word, a circus. I think we were in the car from hell, though Chao swears that the others were worse. The people in there reminded me of what you might see on a typical visit to the DMV. Too harsh? Perhaps. After all, at the DMV, people don't spit on the floor and throw their uneaten food there either. Not even at the one in Santa Ana! Sorry. The sad irony was that the car we were in was maintained by a saint of a woman in a way I have NEVER seen on any train anywhere. Of course, if the passengers in it didn't treat it the way a baby treats a diaper, she wouldn't have had so much to do. Anyway, she more than earned her yuan. Oh and the noise. I cannot begin to describe what that was like. Between all the yelling, screaming into cell phones and the loud radio program piped in to the whole car, my iPod finally met it's match. When I went to turn it on, a message appeared on the screen saying "Yeahh, right!" Actually, despite my killer headphones and the poor thing at full blast, I was only able to escape as far as purgatory. And just to put the cherry on the sundae, the last scene was the best. Some loud, shirtless pile of #!*%# tried to forcibly open the bathroom with a knife which the woman had locked as the train was arriving to the station. He yelled at her to open it, kicked it very hard twice and finally, she relented. I felt so bad for her. To think that she has to deal with this kind of crap day in and day out, depressed the heck out me.

So finally got to Tunxi and hopped in a taxi for a 45 minute ride to Huangshan. The road we took to get here was honestly, the nicest road in all China. The tunnels we went through looked brand new. There were hardly any cars on the road (it was approaching 11:00) which allowed our driver a chance to really let it all out! It was actually pleasurable getting to the hotel. The hotel is the nicest one I've been in on the whole trip and after yesterday, a welcomed relief!

Here, by the way, is one of the more picturesque spots in the country. Tomorrow we will spend around 10 hours hiking and taking it all in. Today we got our feet wet (literally) at a series of waterfalls that required some trekking. It was beautiful and got us kind of fired up for tomorrow. The food here in Anhui province is very nice but I stayed away from the rat and dog entrees. If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I might not have believed it.

Hope to blog after the hike or at the latest, upon arriving in Shanghai for the last three nights of this adventure. Stay tuned...

(Mostly) Cruising the Yangtze - Wuhan, China

I got a hold of the contract that bus drivers in this country sign upon being handed the keys. I looked and looked, but nowhere did I see any kind of stipulation requiring the driver to push the physical limits of the vehicle at every possible moment. Nor could I find any language pertaining to the number of times that passengers' butt cheeks should leave their rightful place on the seat. This, of course, ought to give you an idea of what the three-hour drive was like the other night in lieu of cruising time. This was due to high levels of river water which for some reason, makes it dangerous for cruise ships. Ironically, all of us brave souls were put on a bus driven by someone who had to have been exposed to pesticides as an infant. I know I'm prone to exaggerate, but the audible gasps of others on the bus would seem to confirm my take on the situation.

The bus finally (literally) came to a screeching halt at 10:30 whereupon we all descended a couple of hundred steps down to the river and then (with suitcase in hand) walked about 300 yards on a series of catwalks suspended precariously over the water out to the ship. Oh and it was basically pitch black out there. Nice beginning! The room was nothing luxurious by any stretch, but it was plenty adequate. That first night, the ship didn't budge. The following morning, did a tour of the ghost city of Fengdu. To get there, we had to retrace our steps from the night before. It was only then that I fully appreciated what we all had to endure the night before. We were all herded around by a woman with a portable microphone and one of those flags that tour guides wave. I simply can't think of too many things that I hate more than precisely this kind of tourist experience. But, I sucked it up and dealt with it for the moment. It didn't help that it was very, very hot and there were dozens and dozens of other tour groups doing exactly the same thing. Almost all were Chinese groups, of course.

As a Cuban, I am well within my rights to say that Cubans are some of the loudest people in the history of the world. But I have to say, that even some of the most raucous Cubanazos I know simply wouldn't be able to keep up with some of the folks I spent the past few days with. And to make matters even more festive, is the peculiar habit of firing up a cigarette for just about any reason. Let's see...we all took turns posing in front of this pagoda, we must smoke. We just climbed this intimidating staircase...we're all sweating and out of breath so...let's all have a ciggy! In all my China euphoria from last year, I simply had forgotten about the love affair this country has with the cancer sticks. I'm considering taking up the habit when I return, since in the week I've been here, I've second-handed a repugnant quantity of smoke...I might as well get the less-offensive stuff straight from the source.

But back to my cruise...This was my first cruise experience. Did I mention I was the only American? And no, for once I am not exaggerating. I know this because, the tour organizer had the peculiar practice of identifying the foreigners by their nationalities. So I also know that there were 2 Brits, 8 French and 2 Dutch. This out of 150 passengers. Kind of par for the course on this trip for me, so no worries. Oh, the food...well done there! There was plenty of it and it was very good. I was so pleased that after the first day, the fork and knife that had been there the first meal were gone. At one point I did drop some cabbage in my beer, but everyone was very kind to overlook that.

The river itself was something of a disappointment. It's called The Mighty Yangtze and this is fine if by 'mighty', they mean 'mighty polluted'. What a shame. There is a lot of natural material that stays on the surface and that's fine, but the floating slippers, bottles and other crap are not so nice. The water is very brown and murky as well. However, the actual gorges are well, gorgeous. Fantastic scenery without a doubt!

Yesterday, we were taken on a smaller boat for an hour to a completely almost pristine part of the river and then transferred into canoes that were rowed by local men. This was great. The water was so inviting and the mini-gorges were almost better than the bigger, more famous ones. Upon returning, we were informed that the ship would not be going through the locks and passing by the third of the three big gorges. Again, something having to do with the water levels and a back up of other ships with higher priority. Hmmm. So today, we toured the impressive dam facility by bus and foot. Then we got on a bus (thankfully piloted by someone who hadn't been sniffing glue) and drove the final leg of the cruise.

Hopped on a train and five hours later, here I am. Only here, it should be noted, as a bit of a break in the miles. Tomorrow, I am prepared to endure what will probably be the worst travel day on the whole trip. For one, it's going to be nine hours (at least). Second, it's on a bus...don't get me started again. And third, a decent chunk of the time will be spent driving all kinds of curves at all kinds of elevations. Fun, fun, fun. The payoff will be in the scenery when the sun rises on Wednesday. More to come...

The Sizzle - Chongqing, China

If you know me then you know of my heritage and can assume some things about what my diet must have included ever since I was a little 'mocoso'. Point is, I've been an eater and lover of spicy foods forever. I'm not fanatical like the old man, but I love a good curry, hot sauce or whatever dish has a little kick to it. Despite all manner of hot and spicy foods that I have consumed all over the world, what happened yesterday was a first.

The 'hotpot' experience involves cooking any number of things using chopsticks in a huge kettle-like thing of a chili-saturated sauce right at your table. Imagine a sadistic version of fondue and you got the idea. You order all the stuff raw and it appears moments later on a huge tray. You wait for the chili to start to boil and then drop your food into the murky, chili-infested waters. Mercifully, you are also given a bowl of toasted sesame oil and raw garlic which you add to the sesame oil as much as you'd like. Prior to eating your food, you dip it in the oil to take some of the edge off. So, after all this build up, you know that it was painfully hot. However, it was also very tasty. It wasn't just hot for hot's sake; there was a lot of great flavor there. There are two main chilis at work here and one of them is not much bigger than a peppercorn. Small though it might be, the punch in that little peppper caused my lips to tingle in a freakish way. That's never happened. It was as if someone had attached electrodes to my lips and thrown a switch. I was later informed that dentists here use that particular chili as a novacaine substitute! And of course, the more I ate, the more it went on. And it goes without saying, that the sweating that went on was legendary. In my haste to mop my brow, I (more than once) wiped off my forehead and cheeks with napkins that had been used to wipe off the chili sauce, so within minutes, pretty much my whole face was a tingly mess. I was encouraged not to drink the beer for relief because that would only cause the next bite to appear to be hotter than it actually was. It was quite the experience. I am so relieved that I was able to eat quite a bit and with the exception of some heartburn, I didn't suffer the kind of intestinal distress that I thought would surely be my destiny.

The over 6 1/2 hour ride here from Chengdu was nowhere near the pleasant experience that my first bus ride in this country was. The driver...where to begin?!? Nice enough of a guy, but not what I would think of as being a pro. Were it only for smoking half a pack of cigarettes or talking with his buddy in the first row for half the ride, then he might've been OK. But he also seemed to pay too much attention to the TV monitor just above his head and spend too much time on his cell phone. And the dozen or so times he hocked up a nice phlegm biscuit didn't do a whole lot to endear me to him either. Oh and he drove the bus through a curvy, hilly region with a little too much gusto for my taste. It was a memorable ride on a trip where there have already been a few too many. Crap, I have three more to go I think.

This city is staggeringly huge and not all that picturesque in a nice way, to be honest. My hostel is sandwiched and dwarfed by huge tenement apartment buildings which are covered in city-filth and look like they were all the rage right about the time Nixon was getting his walking papers. It's really something to see yet another huge city in this country. And huge in China is not like huge in USA. This city would probably only be topped by NY, as far as people go. And I just left Chengdu which could claim the same thing. On it goes...I heard the other day that the population is now 1.3 billion here. Just imagine what it would be if the government here was a little more relaxed when it comes to such things.

Tomorrow I head off on a three-night, four day cruise of the Yangste River. I know, I know, I claim to not do cruises. Well, this is on a river, so that's the first thing to understand. Also, to come to this part of the country and not do this cruise is not really an option. It's supposed to be staggeringly beautiful. However, I was informed tonight that due to the rising levels of the river, I will not be able to board here in Chongqing. I will have to (oh, the agony!) hop on a bus for three hours to board down river somewhere else. Lovely.

I doubt seriously I'll be able to write anything until after the trip, so until then, eat something spicy and think of me. Especially if you have to get up in the middle of the night to deal with some of the consequences!

Bon Appetit!

The Oddysey - Can Tho, Vietnam

Yes, more whining is surely to follow so get ready...It involves a tuk-tuk, 2 motos, 2 buses and a taxi.

Left my hotel in Kampot this morning at 8:30 and arrived at the new one in Can Tho, Vietnam at 5:00 pm. The hotel is only $15/night, but for once, I'm getting what I paid for. What a dump. Were it not already paid for and the fact that no one there seems to know any English other than 'passport', I'd try to get my money back and go elsewhere. Oh well, live and learn.

The tuk-tuk took basically about 2 hours to get to Vietnam. Took the same road to Kep initially and then veered off on yet another red dirt road which wasn't in all that bad a shape at first given the rains the past couple of days. Again, mile after mile of amazing scenery...folks planting rice, that sort of thing. The road was basically OK except for the last kilometer. It's as if the Cambodian government figured, whoever is on this road is leaving anyway...why bother to do anything to maintain it even a little. I truly regret that I did not film that stretch.

At the border the tuk-tuk guy inofrmed me that the town where the bus is caught wasnot walking distance. Indeed, it was like 10km away. Lucky for me, his buddy would take me on his moto for $5. "But what about my heavy suitcase?" I wondered. No problem. Sure enough, the driver positioned it bewteen his legs and with me on the back, off we went. The first thing I noticed upon crossing the border was the asphalt. As in, the fact that it existed. Good start.

Arrive at the bus station (really, it was a small section of a small parking lot) and rode right up to this guy's buddy. Wow! Such luck! He tells me that the bus for Can Tho left for the day, but for $5, he can take me to the next town (20 km. away) to catch another bus. Hmm. What choice do I have? There is no signage anywhere as to indicate a schedule. There is nothing in English anywhere either. So be it. Off we go...

At about 11:45, we stop at an ATM so I can get some dong. OK, feel free to make all the sophomoric jokes you want at this point. But $1 buys 17,000 dong! Crazy. I only got $100 worth or so for the moment. We leave the main road and go on this very bumpy dirt and stone road into a residential zone, though not at all pleasant. So now I am thinking that I am about to be robbed. Really. We pull up in front of this house where about 6 men are hanging out shooting the bull. I have picked out the smallest one thinking that if need be, he can be the one I thump. I swear, this is going through my mind. The moto driver speaks next to no English. I tell him that this is NOT a bus station. He tells me to sit. Like hell. He says in 15 minutes a big bus will appear. I can't imagine a Greyhound thing rumbling down this little country road, basically. But sure enough, here comes a bus. Big? Hardly, but it IS a bus. I am told it will take 5 hours. Lovely. I pick a seat in the back. There is next to no one aboard. I start out on yet another bumpy 2-lane 'highway' andtake in all the new scenery.

Three hours later, we pull over and I am told I need to board a different bus. OK. I get on this much bigger bus and I am stared at as if I had just arrived from the surface of the moon. No one speaks English though this drunk guy smoking cigarettes tries to talk to me in very shaky English. He smelled like Milwaukee and I wasn't up for it. I made the mistake of sitting in a seat of a woman who apparently worked on the bus. She made it clear that I was not to sit there and gave me a shove as I was moving. Were it not for the fact that I had been in the country for three hours, I think I drop her right there. Two hours later after listening to the driver go no more than 42 seconds without laying on the LOUD horn, we arrived.

I hopped into a taxi and located my dive of a hotel. Too early to say, but Vietnam appears every bit as hectic as Kampot was placid. Things are cheap, however. More on that later. Off to sleep for a very early wake up tomorrow to check out some picturesque floating gardens.

Z

Rain...lots of rain. - Kampot, Cambodia

A few drops fell as the bus approached this town. And pretty much from the moment I arrived not quite 24 hours ago, it has rained and rained. It's funny how just a couple of days ago I was cursing myself for loading up my suitcase with silly things like my waterproof shell and the baseball warm-up thing I wore on the plane so as not to be too cold. Not that it's cold, per se, but there is a 25 - 30 degree difference between here and when I started in Siem Reap a week ago and getting soaked when it's barely in the 70's isn't all that pleasant.

But back to that bus. I've been on a million buses all over the world, but I have to say that the first 2 hours and last 30 minutes of the 4 1/2 ride yesterday was the worst bus ride experience ever. Were it only for the ride itslef, it would be one thing, but factor in the meat locker-like temperature and the television playing karaoke in Khmer very loudly and you get a better idea. Yet again, the iPod and bulky noise-cancelling headphones saved the day. The ride the other day was paradise compared to yesterday. The bus was not the same caliber as the first one so everytime we ran over a cigarette butt, we felt it inside. Yes, I'm exaggerating, but not by much. I am so thankful that I opted not to have breakfast before boarding because it would've been messy. My road experiences in Cambodia are almost done, thankfully.

Kampot is nothing like Phnom Penh. I am so relieved. This is a funky place that time more or less forgot, it seems. There are dozens of examples of old colonial French houses that are in various states of neglect. It kind of reminds me of the malecon in Havana. So there is a certain charm amidst all the squalor. There is still way too much trash all over the damned place, but that's the only resemblance to PP. The town is experiencing something of a revival and in ten years, who knows? But seriously, the people here need take care of their beautiful country a bit more. The other day in PP, I was walking around minding my own business when suddenly three feet in front of me, a plastic bag with food scraps went wizzing by me and into the street. The woman who had tossed it didn't see me coming, but that's hardly the point. I don't care about political correctness- being a slob is being a slob in any country and in any language.

So back to the rain. Ironically, in the moments since I started writing, it seems to have basically stopped. I had intended to visit a couple of attractions nearby riding on the back of a moto with some guy who offered to take me around today, but the rain kind of scared me off. I don't care about me getting wet, but I do care about the camera and all. I think I'll proceed, but in a tuk-tuk instead as they offer some shelter. I'm going to Kep, a small town nearby where the seafood is supposed to be amazing and then off to a cave to see some spectacular scenery. More to report later, weather permitting. And I don't say this lightly. About four days ago, the town flooded. Hoping to stay relatively dry...

Oh yeahh...Larium update: Thrilled to report that after one bizarre dream which involved me petting a dog or cat only to discover that its claws were made of sharp blades, I slept the rest of the night totally weird-dream-free! And in all fairness, that particular episode may or may not have been anti-malarial drug inspired. Who knows? It might have been the spicy Indian food I ate for dinner served by a Welsh dude and washed down with a Laotian beer (trying to mix things up a bit.)